BROCCOLI PANCAKES With blackened xistorra and a delicate horseradish cream by Tiffany Carter

For the pancakes

- 1 LARGE HEAD OF BROCCOLI, WITHOUT ITS STEM
- 1/4 CUP CHOPPED UP ONION
- 1 LARGE CHOPPED UP GARLIC CLOVE
- 1/4 CUP OLIVE OIL
- 2/3 CUP FLOUR
- A DROP OF CHILI OIL
- A PINCH OF DRIED DILL
- A PINCH OF SALT
- A BIG EGG
- 1/4 CUP MILK
- PAPRIKA

For the xistorra

- XISTORRA

For the horseradish cream

- 1 CUP SOUR CREAM OR CREAM FRAÎCHE
- 1/4 CUP GRATED FRESH HORSERADISH
- TABLESPOON DIJON MUSTARD
- TEASPOON WHITE WINE VINEGAR
- 1/2 TEASPOON SALT
- 1/4 TEASPOON PEPPER

1) Light a candle in your kitchen; not only is it romantic, but the light has been broken for going on two weeks.

2) Cut the broccoli into small trees and steam them.

3) Put the broccoli, onions, garlic and chili into a bowl and smash them into a fine puree, perhaps with a meat tenderizer.

4) Mix in the oil, flour, dill and salt.

5) Mix in the egg and the milk.

6) Smear a skillet with butter and heat it.

7) Smear another skillet with butter and heat it.

8) Now, drop big spoonfuls of batter into the first skillet and if necessary, flatten them with something.

9) Begin frying the xistorra.

10) After a minute or so, flip the pancackes.

11) Pile them onto a plate when you think they are done.

12) Make your horseradish cream by mixing up all the stuff under "For the Horseradish Cream" and refrigerating it for four hours. You should have done that last night, though. I think you should kick yourself for never reading all the way through a recipe before beginning it.

13) The acrid fumes of burning xistorra are stinging your nose. Quickly turn off the heat and walk with the pan to where there is light.

14) And then, God laughed.

15)Sometimes ain't a thing to be done.